catchyuniquename:

Me too. Got an ointment for it though.

You aren’t unattractive Ben.

(Source: reactivating, via disconnekt)

lightisart:

Happy birthday to me :) I bought myself a new gloveset.

Too much is going on to be happy all the time. Sometimes, a lot of times… I just want to go home and sit in my room and play minecraft with Frankie and Jake, Or League with Steven or something. Or just listen to music and talk about Trance and shit.

Its like a safe zone, with my music on in the background, there is no stress, just having fun in a way that I want to have fun.

My dad is an asshole. I haven’t just now realized that, I’ve known and simply dealt with it. But im just sort of done with him right now. He could leave tomorrow and never see me again and the fucks I would give would be so little. At least then he wouldn’t try taking my mom to court for custody and money issues. So whatever. I told him Im refusing to speak to him until he fixes things. He basically said I was just mimicking my mother, and I cant develop my own opinion, and my thoughts are wrong because of that.

Newsflash. If your own son tells you you are an asshole and lays down reasons why, and all you have to say is ” You are just like your mother…” You’re probably an asshole.

then comes life outside of sleep school and my skype calls. Too much happening there. I want to spend money on what makes me happy. There’s to much peer pressure everywhere. I’m sorry I don’t want to go get fucked up in a cabin for 90 dollars, or drive to San Fran and get fucked up there, or go camping and get fucked up in the woods or something. I just don’t want to. It’s not that I don’t love my friends, I love them all, a ton, more than anything. I just don’t want to do that. Heres a fun fact about Sean katcher:

He doesn’t really enjoy getting drunk or High. It’s fun for the hour or two that you are too drunk to know that you aren’t enjoying yourself. Before hand You just don’t want to be there, and The next day you regret being there. Same with Smoking. I just don’t enjoy it that much. Sometimes I get random bursts where I’m like wow, I could be high right now. But then deep down I know that it just is kind of a waste of time, and is only fun in the moment, and a waste when I look back on it. (As far as substance goes, the only one I enjoy is E because I can do what I love most, Just be in the company of my friends without any worry of judgment or pressure or anything. Sharing feelings etc. Some people say you can get that without a drug. Lol no, sorry. You can’t. Not to this extent)

So when your in the car and your friends start prodding you to call someone to ask them for weed, and you are like “no” and then you get called, even though jokingly, a pussy and get prodded to just do it.  you just get stressed out, not to mention feeling like you just let all of your friends down.

That is what it all comes down to. Stress. The outside world just puts stress on you. No car? No big deal, share with your mother, be 45 minutes late to pick her up from her job, where she is just waiting for you because your work was busy and you couldn’t leave early. Sorry mom. But no car means less hours because my schedule is less flexible. less hours is less pay. less pay is less money. Now I have just enough money to sort of dick around with. cool. Money is an outside stress. It fucks with your head. Fuck money.

Sometimes you just want to go out and be with your friends and shit, but just be with them. Go to a rave without one of them wanting to sneak a flask in. Go to get dinner without the statement” Oh my god lets find a party tonight” being said… every. Single. Time. 

Stress. It’s all about stress.

And when the only place I feel Stress free is in my room, either on skype with my 2 closest friends, or in my bed under the blanket…… Then I don’t even know. I don’t even have a witty wrap up statement. That’s just that. Stress is fucking you up the ass unless you hide away.

Now I know why nerds are deemed ‘nerds.’

Because they can’t seem to escape stress that the outside world throws at them. SO they go where they are safe. I just want to be safe.

Sitting and waiting for seanykay to get off work blahblahblah I’m on Sean’s phone blahblahblah. Where is kevin ????